As I stood underneath the gargantuan Caesar’s Palace Marquee, balancing a glass of 20-year tawny port and chasing it with a mandatory yet celebratory glass of champagne to ring in the New Year, the sky begins to explode in splendiferous color.
It must be midnight! Happy New Year!!! The excitement can be felt & heard from the 314,000 people jam-packed on Las Vegas Blvd.
The sky sparkled in fireworks from Paris, to Planet Hollywood to Caesar’s Palace. Behind me we’re explosions from Treasure Island, The Venetian and to the Stratosphere. And as much as I looked forward, I occasionally looked back to see if I was missing anything.
But I wasn’t.
Every sparkly explosion colorized the sky above me, ahead of me and that’s what matters most. What’s behind was once important but what’s ahead is where I choose to stay focused. Look up and move forward. That’s how I’ve chosen to start and plan to continue into 2012.
Happy Fruit(ful) year dearies!
No dream you have is crazy.
It’s only crazy if you haven’t any.
Should anyone ever say, “you can’t do that, or
that’s impossible.” Just remember that if you dream it, see it and believe it - then it IS possible.
Simply respond to negativity with your infectious smile, positive outlook and belief in that you can do anything and you’d be crazy if you never tried to achieve what you dream!
Dreams are declarations.
Honor what’s in your heart and in your head.
Changes are a constant. Always in motion, changing into each moment - in perpetuity.
I welcome change yet I find it hard to keep up with it all. Can’t everything change yet stay the same? Ah, yet another conundrum of how to make the improbable and impossible into possibleness. Leave it to me, I will find the way.
As I sit here, perched up in my Hollywood Hills tree house, I can’t help but want to stay sitting in this window forever. Yet the reality is that 7 days from now, this will no longer be my home of inspiration and wonderment. I’m moving on to a much better place, I am moving in with the man I love who will become my husband. But right now all I can think about is how can I keep my current life and mesh it with my future.
A year ago, I sat in this very window and wondered how I would make the impossible possible by meeting a man and going on a date. A simple date, that’s it. I hadn’t any deeper expectations and by that point, I had been date-free for three years. I wasn’t expecting the world yet a year later and what feels like a lifetime ago I’m now engaged, getting married next spring. Who would’ve thought? Certainly not I, but now, here we are.
The longer I rattle around in my own skull space, the more I become outta touch and eventually run outta time to enjoy what I have. I sometimes I alienate myself so much I lose the very thing I am terrified of losing, which is time.
Have I made the most of my lofty view? Did I absorb all my breathing space had to give? I hope I did, as my sojourn is almost to a close, time to turn the page into the next chapter.
However I worry, if I lose my view, do I lose a dream? If I move into suburbia into the simplicity of four walls, do I lose my vision? Or am I merely writing more into the story that has yet to be told? The writer in me wants to stay and the realist in me says it’s time to leave. Who’s the devil and who’s the angel? Damn it, I embody both. Joke is on me.
6 more sunrises, 7 more sunsets - almost time to find out how story unfolds.
Did you know that That Girl hasn’t been on tour or a tour bus since September 5th, 2010?
What? Seriously? Pardon Me?
Yep - That Girl who’s usually out globe-trotting has been mostly grounded for the last 365. Ok, yes, some quick pops between LA, Las Vegas, Montreal, Tampa and one super quick jaunt to Paris but hey - that’s nothing compared to previous years!
So one might ask, just what the hell have I been up to?
Well, after the last tour September 2010, I went to work for a brilliantly funny and vibrant talk show host. Yep! I actually took a real job, at a real studio and lived the LA lifestyle of a ten mile commute that took 90 minutes to drive. I ate lunch in the commissary that was nestled between sound stages housing some of my favorite shows such as The Big Bang Theory and Two & A Half Men. After work, I’d go to the gym on the Warner Brothers lot to avoid rush hour gridlock. Go home to make dinner, go to bed and do it all again the next day.
And as amazing as it was to land such a primo gig with some of the best people in the world to work with, I quickly got cabin fever and ached for a tour bus, a day sheet, a load in, in another country. I didn’t adapt well from traveling the world to commuting to the same office 5 days a week. It’s pretty sad when I couldn’t hack a real gig. It’s quite embarrassing to admit I probably left one of the best jobs because I couldn’t wrap my head around it. Funny enough, it was the job I had painted in my head as the ideal transition from touring into the real world. I was either wrong or simply just to weak to adapt.
So, I continued on to another detour of self-discovery. I couldn’t work in a real world setting - so now what? Then poof! An offer comes and I jump at the opportunity. A tour that’s not a tour. Fast forward to rehearsals in Montreal, then Florida and back to Montreal and then install permanently in Las Vegas, living in a casino hotel. My commute is one of comedy and sadness and no car required. I simply walk from the hotel room elevators across a smoke-filled casino full of drunk people gambling away their nest eggs on penny slot machines, to walk into the venue and into my production office. I live, work, eat and commute all within one casino. This is not a real world setting, but its my new world.
I’ll let you know how the story goes…………
I’ve been off line and off the map for far too long now.
What can I say - lots going on and once again, I ignore what I’d really like to be doing, which is writing. But seriously, WTF have I been up to since I last blogged on my birthday - 125 days ago????
Well, let’s go down the jet set-esque list shall we?
Rang in the New Year in Tampa, then I flew home to LA to chill, hike and indoor sky dive for a week. I turned right back around and flew back to Florida to start rehearsals for a new show set to debut at Caesars Palace. On January 16, I checked into my first hotel and spent the next 95 nights between West Palm Beach, Montreal and finished with 72 nights living in a casino in Las Vegas.
And no, I’m not on tour. Crazy right?!?!
Needless to say, I’ve been a bit stifled. Too busy to blog, having not much to share or say - however, I think a bit of laziness and feeling displaced took a bit of my voice away. This time it was me who shut me up versus being shut down by some Swiss wanker. (you know who you are)
It’s been almost 8 months since I last stepped foot on a tour bus and there are days of deeply entrenched withdrawal; longing for a coffin on a tour bus to wake up in an exotic city with a day off to kick around and explore. Then other days where if I never had to shower in a port-a-shower in some random ass festival field in Europe, in the dead of summer, I would be completely fine without it. Although, one will always miss the sound of 60,000 screaming fans, cheering for the band you are lucky enough to work for. And now, I work in Vegas, while living in a hotel room adjacent the venue. It’s almost like being on tour, right?
I once thought touring made life complicated, but no - in reality, being on tour was easy. Now that I’ve a steady gig in one place, I find myself with three residences; two on each coast and one in the desert. What???
Yep. I live in the hotel in Vegas when I work, I rent a lovely little beach house near my family in Florida and I also rent an amazing guest house in the Hollywood Hills, in the city I love and also where my new boyfriend lives. Good god - I think I need to tour again to simplify. I have no solution to my current conundrum but I guess I will hold down the forts to see what happens next. I know for a fact I sometimes take on too much and do too much but in reality - it feels like never enough.
Oh dear - I have quality problems.